Exercises in Style

Narrative

The boy was two years old, and his parents went to a party. His father was sitting in between his mother and him at a circular table. He was in a highchair that attached to the table. Towards the end of the dinner, a man came around and poured the father a shot glass filled with some kind of alcohol. The glass was on his left and he turned to his right to talk to his wife. Suddenly she gasped and before he could turn around, their son had picked up the shot glass and downed the contents in one gulp. They did not know what to do, so they decided to stay at the party. For a while their son seemed fine, but about five minutes later he began to throw silverware all over the place. He was screaming, laughing and completely out of control so his parents had no choice but to leave the party.

When they got home the boy showed no signs of letting up. His parents had no idea what to do and decided to call poison control. The man on the phone asked if the child was sleeping and they responded that he was “running around the house like a lunatic.” The man from poison control laughed and said, as long as he’s not sleeping, he’ll be fine. The man said to give the child some milk to settle his stomach, and eventually he would be fine.

Retrograde

The man from poison control hung up the phone. He had just spoken to a family and told them their two year old son would be fine. They had called him after coming home from a party where their son had downed a shot of alcohol before they could stop him. A man had poured the shot and placed it too close to the child who probably thought it was apple juice. When the parents took their son to the party, they probably had no idea what was in store.

Haiku

Three go to party

Two year old drinks alcohol

Called for help boy fine

Negativities

The boy wasn’t one or three, but two, and not his aunts or uncles, but parents didn’t take him to school or the doctor, but to a party. Not a woman or boy, but a man came by and didn’t neglect them, but didn’t pour the wife, but rather the husband and father a drink of something that was not juice or tea, but something alcoholic. The child didn’t sit still, but instead grabbed at and didn’t sip or taste, but downed the shot of alcohol. For a while he was not wild, but eventually he started acting not sane, but insane. His parents did not try to quell him or stay around, but took him home. The parents did not wait and see what happened to their son, but didn’t call the doctor or lawyer, but poison control. The man from poison control did not ask what brand the alcohol was, or how long it had been aged, but simply said that if the boy was not sleeping, but instead awake and running around then he would not be in any danger, but rather okay.